This little girl is having friend troubles. I can hardly keep up. Everyday someone else is mad and won't play in their group. She used to play with different friends and the drama was kept at a minimum, now with a different group it is girl drama central. I can't help but cringe. I don't know what to do. It brings back terrible memories from my past and a friend who decided that we couldn't be friends any more. Past girls being mean and selfish.Apparently she used to play with a different group and has a really good friend there, but the other girls thought she was a bit weird (as she puts it) so she doesn't play with them anymore. She says they won't even look at her when they pass by. My heart aches. I wish I could make it all better. Who couldn't love this kind hearted little lady?
This year hasn't gone so well for her. A new class with no friends in it. A new class with some old friends from a class a few years ago, that now have new friends and don't want to play at recess. I wish that she had some friends who share her same values. I wish that she had a really good friend down the street to laugh with a giggle with after school. I wish she had someone to sit by her every lunch and recess and laugh with her. I feel sad when she tells me she spent her lunch time in the library reading books (although I have nothing against reading books).
It just brings back the wounds that are still a bit fresh for me. Girls can be so mean sometimes. The sad thing is, it doesn't change when you are a mom either. Girls are still mean sometimes. They still say means things. They still look at you as in judgment. They still can make you feel worthless. I wish I could make it all better. I guess this is how we learn and grow - watching our children struggle as we did, and not knowing what to do.
10 comments:
Exactly what I'm worried about for my kids and what I went through too. It's the lessons she'll learn and feelings she'll remember so she'll understand how others feel and be compassionate and friends to everyone.
It's sooo hard to go through but I think harder to watch.
Worth it.
Awwww I totaly understand what you are going through...When we moved here Oaklee had a lot of Drama with some of the girls..infact it wasnt till just recently that its calmed down!! When you guys move back she will have atleast one friend....May not be down the street anymore, but we will have to get them together lots!!! :)
I'm so sorry Stacy. We are going through the same thing. Why does it have to be so hard? My heart aches for her.
I'm right there with ya. Alyssa has gone through three sets of good friends this year, and it breaks my heart. I too remember the drama, that continued for me for quite some time. These experiences will make her a stronger person, and gives you the opportunity to be her best friend for a while.
So sorry. That is the one thing I am dreading as my kids get older. I remember those days WAY too well. And it seemed that they lasted until High School. I am so not excited for Jr. High.
I think you nailed the issue on the head when you said that these problems don't go away for adults. Perhaps that's the problem. Women who were once Queen Bee's themselves allow their daughters to behave the same way. Meanwhile the rest of us who were the nice girls watch our girls go through the same obnoxious cycle. I'm sorry you both have to go through this. I don't eagerly anticipate the day when my daughter goes through the same thing.
That stinks, girls are no fun sometimes in groups. hopefully she will come out of this stronger and realize some girls just aren't worth it. We all seem to learn the hard way about that. I feel bad that Madi is going through this though, she doesn't need that.
I am so sorry Miss Madi. Sometimes a good cry helps, but most of all you will always know that I love you.
Grandma Cooper
Oh I went through that too in my youth. I really hated it and was deeply scarred. After a while I wasn't that interested in spending time with other girls anymore, but had more guys as friends. Of course that didn't help me get along better with the girls. Not by a long shot. But I didn't care anymore.
I've gone through some very difficult times of loneliness and you're right that it doesn't even end when you're grown-up.
Sometimes it's just easier with the boys. If they quarrel, they just punch each other in the face and they'll be the best of friends after that. :)
A girl in our neighborhood called Audrey "4 eyes" and Audrey was more upset that the fact this girl called her "4 eyes" meant she was calling me that (since I am now wearing a pair myself). I thought that was so sweet that she'd worry about me but I still wanted to kick the girl in the shins for my baby's sake. I know, I'm really mature about crap like that. I always tell myself I would rather my child be the one being picked on than the one doing the picking. Not that that makes it any easier to handle but, it helps a teeny bit...kinda
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